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Tuesday, April 15, 2014

Onward

I was talking to my sister yesterday or Saturday, I can't remember. But I specifically told her I didn't think I had 6 weeks of pregnancy left in me...Cut to today, I find out its very possible I won't. It is also very possible I will, but I just thought it interesting that I felt that way, and then I went to my doctor the very next day and basically had my feelings confirmed. I have known for a couple weeks that my amniotic fluid was decreasing; it apparently isn't supposed to do that until about the 38th week. Yeah, not quite where I am at just yet. Its only serious if it continues to do so and starts to happen more quickly. She took images yesterday to see if she could find any sacks of amniotic fluid, and she measured a couple of them to make sure they were big enough to keep her safe and keep her healthy. Next week I have to back to the hospital for my third "official" ultrasound to have them take a more in-depth look at everything and do the non-stress test. As long as everything checks out, I should just have to be monitored once or twice a week. If not, I will have to call someone to pick up Ezra and we will walk over to the operating room and have a baby. Not exactly what we want, but we are very grateful that they are taking all of my concerns very seriously as well as their own and they are doing everything in their power to make sure everything is a-ok! As I am sure it will be. Its just kind of funny. When my mom was pregnant with me, she went in for a scheduled check-up on her lunch break from work. They were doing tests and then they told her she wouldn't be going back to work, she was going to have me that day. I wasn't due until the third or so week in September, but I was born July 14th instead. I was 9 1/2 weeks early. This little girl, even if she comes next week, will only be 5 weeks early, and babies at this stage are more often than not born without problems. She might just be in for some extra monitoring in the NICU, and it bodes well for her that she is a girl, because they tend to do a bit better than boys when born early. So blessing in disguise that I didn't get my second boy? I think so! Since I have been kind of going through things I have become a little more withdrawn. I tend to go through phases of that where I will avoid talking to people, I won't answer my door. I walk around hoping I don't run into people I know, because I just don't feel like talking. Cody & I tend to be very private people. We really like to keep to ourselves, keep all our business private and whatnot. So when I am anticipating news, have something that I am anxious about etc. I just keep to myself. It has nothing to do with anyone else. Just know that if I haven't been so social lately, its nothing to do with you personally, its completely 100% me. I feel like people always assume its them, when in fact people are just going through things and just don't want it all out there, so they pull back. I do this, all the time! So I am sorry if my quiet, reservedness hasn't offended anyone or made them think I am just being a jerk. I am just processing and trying to get myself in a place where I can deal. Now I have to focus on my little E's birthday this week! Can you believe he is already going to be 3!?!?! I sure can't. Time has flown by. My chunky, happy, sweet, cuddly little baby is a very active, VERY talkative, energetic, loving, tall, skinny little boy. He likes to hold my hand, he likes to go on little dates with me. He loves to hug and kiss cheeks. He only stops talking when he is asleep, and even then sometimes he talks in his sleep. He is learning how to recognize letters and numbers & he thinks he can spell his last name (he says "I-T-T-S", he's close). He wants to go to school. And if you ask him, he says he is turning 5, even though he told me he doesn't want to grow up...(me either buddy). It will be hard to let 2 go, as its been such a fun, challenging and just all-around wonderful year, but I am excited to see him grow. He starts pre-school in the Fall, which tugs on my heartstrings just a little, but it has been so rewarding to see how much he learns and grows each and every day asking LOTS of questions and remembering every single little detail. He has really flourished in Nursery without me in there, and I am so happy that he is the cute little guy he is & continues to become. Its all just happening way too fast, as most of you can attest. Well I will post next week (hopefully) on how what we ended up doing for his birthday and how all the testing goes. Hope everyone is having a wonderful week.

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